Tuesday, September 9, 2008

I'll need your computer, your ID pass, and your soul

Monday ended up being pretty uneventful. Crissy and I didn’t have our exit interviews until 3 and 3:30, so we spent most of the day at the Apple store getting technical help from the incredibly patient support guys at the Genius Bar. When the guy helping us couldn’t get something to work on our computer, he decided to give us an $80 upgrade for free just to make it work. So be nice to those people…sometimes an IT guy’s bruised ego works in your favor.

Crissy and I both found our exit interviews to be pretty unceremonious as well. Crissy went first, so I expected to have to kick down the door and save her from the six-headed, fire-breathing, she-lizard that I understood our H.R. lady to be. Armed with a mini-baseball bat and one of my three beauty mirrors (in case she also had the power to turn me to stone by looking directly into my eyes), I headed down the hallway in search of my betrothed. I ran into her about 30 seconds after the start of her interview. “Bring your employee handbook,” she said cheerily. “They don’t need your computer and ID pass until 5 pm.”

Naturally, I found the H.R. woman to be friendly and helpful. She collected my things, smiled, shook my hand, and wished me luck. But just in case, I made sure not to look her in the eyes.

Which I later found out was the right thing to do over drinks with a couple friends after work. My friend Alan informed me that she actually IS the devil’s spawn, but she combs her red-headed bowl-cut over her horns when instructed to do so by Lucifer himself.

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